About a year ago I was in real bad shape…
I can’t convey how bad it was – I thought i was going to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair. I thought I wasn’t goign to be able to physically perform with someone, I thought i wasn’t going to be able to go out and aout and more and would be at the mercey of someone who cared for me – or didn’t really but felt a responsibility.
At one point… exactly a year ago within the last few days — I got that wheelchair I worried aobut and my mom got upset… Telling me that if I get in one, I’m never getting out. Why would she say that? Basically it’s something that you see with elderly people who give up or who have their lives fall apart. Why try any more? It’s not like they will recover that well.
Meanwhile things continued to go down, get worse for me… It came to the point where physically trying was redundant because my body would fail onn me, int eh attempt.
Now it’s been a week since I got back from LA and it hits home every day when I think about how much things have changed in the past year. I didn’t give up, I didn’t stop fighting… I didn’t stop sticking my neck out either (but that’s a different story). The difference si night and day. Where I was doing physical rehab to try to keep some strength, now I am trying to use that strength I’ve regained to live my life agian.
Now if only I wasn’t stuck in the suburbs… but again, that’s a different story.